We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
