I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize