doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
It's rum buckets o'clock
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
