ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
