do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize