I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
