she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
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