Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
