umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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