:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
