went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize
