called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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