i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
