id be glad to
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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