trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
it was like having sex with a tree stump
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
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