i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
