do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Randomize