But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Randomize
