Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Randomize
