And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
