If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
