That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
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