Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
