seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Actions speak louder than pants.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
My life is pants optional.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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