Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Randomize
