Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize