I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I pour the whiskey from now on
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Randomize
