I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Randomize