We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
