it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
