I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
false alarm, still single
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
