Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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