Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
We left an ass print on the piano.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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