I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
