And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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