everyone is single if you try hard enough
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize