Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
