you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
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