Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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