so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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