I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
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