I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
