In the future we'll all be gay
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
