do herpes really smell.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
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