Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
