there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize