That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
