Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
