def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize
