Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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