True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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